Forkers Central

she's totally trippin' out, man.

I have probably seen every single movie that has been in theaters this summer. On Tuesdays the tickets are only $4.20, so I assume they want you to get high off their movies.

I think I want to write an "inspirational" book for children.

With lots of exploding heads.

I love when people do that in movies.

being 18 isn't all that it's cracked up to be.

I still haven't won my full university tuition and/or yacht through the lottery yet.

it reminds me of my current desktop "motivational" wallpaper.

that's what happens when you skateboard off HOLY SHIT HUGE GAPS AND FREAKING MEGA-RAMPS OH MY GOD

also,

"HIS SHOES... POPPED OFF."
"DID YOU SEE THAT? HIS SHOES!"

sit down beside her for lunch with one of those new Wendy's Baconators and talk about how great meat tastes, and drop a subtle hint that her soup uses beef broth. Keep it subtle.

most useful website ever.

I did the hard mode in around 8:30, but only because I couldn't seem to get rhode island in the right way.

electric can openers are sweet.

I heard the people doing the transformers movie did this online contest to make up a line for optimus prime to say, and the winning line gets put in the movie. Then after the contest was over they decided not to do it.

I'd be afraid to walk around with an iPod in Boston, in case the the Boston Police mistake it as a bomb as well.

this reminds me of a Monk episode where an astronaut kills someone and does the whole "hey sorry guyz, couldn't have been me, in space right now brb" routine.