Forkers Central

I have had heartburn for 2+ hours from eating a cinnamon raisin bagel. No butter or cream cheese. Just the bagel.

- Mere "wtmff?" 1975

you know how i know you're gay is one of my favorite games to play. i think you know how i know you're old is going to be even awesomer, especially considering the frequency with which i make fun of justin and jason for being old.

but seriously folks, i hope your heartburn is better mere. not feeling good is the worst.

fuckin' whippersnappers (shakes cane)

You 30somethings are soooo cute!

one day a student came into my office, and she had been drawing and working on a poster with a blue felt-tipped pen, so her hands were blue. i said, 'looks like you're turning into a smurf!"

she looked at me puzzled. "What's a Smurf, Mr. Kyle?"

Don't worry, they'll make a new half animated/half live-action smurf movie soon.

You know how I know I'm old?


My fucking hip still hurts.

I watched Truth or Dare for the first time Friday night and realized I'm as old now as Modonna was when it was filmed.

I have had heartburn for 2+ hours from eating a cinnamon raisin bagel. No butter or cream cheese. Just the bagel.

- Mere "wtmff?" 1975

man, i get heartburn a lot of the time. it's horrible and annoying! it's improved since i limited my drinking quite severely, but that's not an acceptable solution!
just so you know that a lithe young thing like me (hah!) is rockin' the reflux club too.

I watched Truth or Dare for the first time Friday night and realized I'm as old now as Modonna was when it was filmed.

Weird. I have to watch that for my film class.